Mmmmhh the only one who knows are you!

It sounds like you don't have a problem with ur ex anymore. And he's out of your life and no more part of your daily stuff. For me, u are over your expartner, when he isn’t the one you’re thinking about when you wake up in the morning. When u stopped missing him. And when u realize that life is good. Although he isn’t there.

But you're still afraid that this could happen again with the next guy. And - well - I can understand that. You two wanted to marry - that's a huge thing. And you did a lot for him. For your future. And then he left. Who would forget that???

The decision to share a life with somebody else comes from the deepest of the heart. Mmmmhh lets say, should come from the deepest. I can’t understand how people can marry when they know each other for some months or a year. Don’t think that this is enough time to get the feeling, if the person is the right one for the rest of life. Because really deep and true love comes with the time. It develops… And rises…
And if u get hurt at this moment, then u won’t forget that.
I would say, that maybe you're over ur ex, but you still remember the pain. And it's much harder because you two wanted to marry. So it’s not the person, it’s more the disappointment. You’ve been ready to share your life with another human and it seems that he wasn’t.

It’s only logical that you're afraid that this will happen again. Or this could happen again. This is a thing - everybody has to deal with after a breakup of an really serious relationship. Like yours have been..

Well, but to love somebody is the best kind of feeling you can have. It’s just incredible and it brings your life on a level where it wouldn’t ever be without. I got also hurt. And it still hurts. I don’t know why, but I’m not afraid of getting hurt again. I don’t wanne miss love in my life. I don’t wanne miss to wake up beside the human I love. And to find such a person, you have to accept that there’s a risc of getting hurt again.

And – well – I think that’s the point you’re at right now. So – don’t be afraid. I mean u don’t have to date a guy every day. But if you find someone you really like, then you should try. You seem to be a really romantic person, who’s believing in love. And you shouldn’t lose that!! There are a lot of person who don’t know what love is.. And I’m sad for them.. Because: What’s life without love??

(Hope my English is acceptable and you understand what I want to say. : ))

I could write on for hours. But I don’t wanne spam this site anymore. :D

Well – that’s all from the German.

Ahhh I totally forgot to say, that I don’t share the opinion of your friend! Why should you hurt somebody you’re in a relationship with?? You have to trust. And you have – at a point of an partnership – talk about your feelings. Honestly of course. And if you’re afraid of getting hurt again because of your past, then you have to tell that to your new partner. And he will understand. So why should you break somebodies heart?? I totally disagree with that..

I love the comment above me! I never think about hurting anyone with my relationship. I never think about leaving them either. I'm the type of person who wants to work things out no matter what. When my first relationship fell apart, I was single for nearly five years! I completely thought no one will ever like me enough to be their girlfriend but then I met my second boyfriend (my last ex), I feel like he was the one. I'm not over him to tell you the truth, I think about him everyday but not a lot as I used to. I don't get over things very quickly or easily. He's dating someone else now and it hurts even more but there's nothing I can do but live my life and keep improving myself. xoxoxoo

I knew it! I knew you'd get there....good for you! It takes time and it's never a smooth road...and there will be set backs. Brace yourself for them but you are on your way to your next relationship. Trust me. Embrace this awesome feeling of confidence and moving on to better places ;)

to "Reader from Germany" - You have basically nailed it when you said "So it’s not the person, it’s more the disappointment. " Yes, I realize that it was the disappointment of him letting go when I was fighting alone. We were supposed to be a team but he ran away because "he wants something else". He wants pure casual relationship... where he can have fun and not need to worry about commitment. That really disappoints me.... even to this day. I think I miss having someone close.... I think I miss the idea of having a relationship.... and not because I miss him.

Anyways, thank you for your comment because you have analyzed it straight to the point.

I think you already knew it, didn't you? ;)

Yes, I love Halston Heritage dresses! They're my type :-) xoxooo